


Love's a Funny Thing

by prompom



Category: All For The Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Fluff, Insecurity, Light Angst, Love Confessions, M/M, Mild Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-14
Updated: 2019-08-14
Packaged: 2020-08-31 23:47:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,446
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20248639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prompom/pseuds/prompom
Summary: It has a certain ring - "love's a funny thing"~~Andrew is starting to believe it might all be too good to be true.~~Slightly OOC Andrew and Neil because I want them to both be happy, okay?The brief sexual content is a small mention of oral sex.





	Love's a Funny Thing

**Author's Note:**

> Title is from Your Love (Has Ruined My Life)  by Holding Absence

Andrew told Bee something that had been a weight pressing on his chest for a long time; "I don't understand why he likes me"

"Neil?" she questioned, even though she knew the answer.

Andrew nodded.

"Well, why do you like him?"

Andrew's heart pounded in his chest so hard he could nearly taste blood. He wasn't a fan of talking about his feelings still, even after all this time. "He's got a big mouth and doesn't know when to shut it." _And his mouth tastes like mint and cigarettes and home._

"So you like his attitude?" Bee confirmed.

"It infuriates me"

Bee nodded, understanding. He liked the fact that Neil made him_ feel_.

"Can you think of any reasons why he may like you back?"

Andrew shook his head. Andrew was a smoldering rage and Neil was a roaring fire. Andrew imploded and Neil exploded. They were opposite.

"From what you've said about Neil before, I think he values your honesty. I think he likes the fact that you never lie"

"Sometimes I don't tell him the truth" Andrew admitted.

"What do you mean by that?"

"Sometimes-" Andrew shifted and stared at the window behind Bee instead, sometimes it was easier looking at that than her earnest eyes "- if he asks a question I just stay quiet"

Bee removed her glasses and started methodically cleaning them. "What sort of question?"

"If it means anything"

"If what means anything?"

"Us"

Bee put her glasses back in a fixed him with a soft look. "It means a lot, doesn't it?"

_Too much_, he thought, _and I'm terrified if I say so then it'll all come crashing down_. Instead he just answered simply with "Yes"

Bee glanced at the clock. "Oh we only have a few minutes left. Have you got anything else you want to say?"

Andrew shook his head and drained the last of his hot chocolate.

"I'll see you next week Andrew"

Andrew stood up and left. He felt scrubbed raw, like someone had been scraping all his skin with sandpaper. His scars throbbed under his armbands and he itched to make himself bleed again. 

Instead, he went straight to the roof, ignoring all the people in the Tower. He stood on the edge, staring straight down and an unlit cigarette hanging from his lips. He craved to feel the burn in his throat and lungs but couldn't bring himself to lift his arms to light it. He had to settle for the swoop in his stomach from the height.

He was up there for a long time, so long that it had started and stopped raining, when he heard the door to the roof open. Andrew knew it was Neil without turning around. Only Neil knew he would be here.

He stood next to Andrew. They both silently stared out for a moment. "You're soaking"

Andrew plucked at the t-shirt that was stuck to his skin. It was cold. "It rained"

"Should've gone inside" 

"Didn't feel like it"

Neil pulled a crumpled pack of cigarettes out of his pocket and lit one. He took a single drag and held it out to Andrew. He dropped the still unlit, and soggy, cigarette from his mouth and took the new one. It still tasted like Neil's lips. 

Andrew looked at Neil; he was wearing a baggy PSU hoodie that touched his knees, the orange clashing horribly with his hair. His eyes were wide and blue and questioning. He had a bruise on his jaw from their last game, the black of it standing out against his stark white skin. "You're a mess" Andrew said, taking another drag.

"I've always been a mess" Neil replied. Instead of smoking, he held the cigarette close to his face, inhaling the smell.

He looked so beautiful. The sun was setting and giving his skin an unearthly glow. His head was raised slightly. He swallowed and his Adam's apple bobbed temptingly. 

Andrew wanted to kiss him. 

He wanted to run his fingers over his scarred skin. 

He wanted to push Neil against the wall and take his dick in his mouth until he came down his throat.

He didn't though. He quickly looked away when Neil looked at him and stayed silent. 

In some ways, Andrew missed being on the medication. It was a lot easier to talk then. He could laugh and smile, even though it was hollow and empty. Now he couldn't do any of those things. He could just about get out of bed most mornings.

"Andrew?"

Andrew looked at him. Neil was staring again, his blue eyes impossibly deep.

"This isn't nothing, is it?"

"What isn't nothing?" Andrew asked, even though he already knew the answer.

"Us" Neil replied, shifting his left foot and looking down. "I don't want it to be nothing"

"Can I ask you a question?"

"Yes"

"Why do you like me?" He felt childish for asking.

Neil was quiet for a long time. So long that Andrew thought he wasn't going to answer. "You make me feel real. Why do you like me?"

Truth for a truth. That was their deal. "You make me feel"

The corner of Neil's mouth came up in a lopsided smirk. "Feel what?"

Andrew threw his cigarette to the floor, watching it sizzle and splitter in a puddle. "Pissed off most of the time"

Neil laughed. Andrew wanted to hold that sound in his chest for as long as he lived.

"Let's go back to the dorm" Neil suggested, still smiling his dumb lopsided grin.

"Why?"

"So I can kiss you"

"What's wrong with here?"

"You're soaking wet, you need to get changed"

Andrew rolled his eyes but agreed. The chill in the air had sunk through his wet clothes and down to his bones. They ignored everyone as they walked to the bedroom. Neil locked the door behind them so Kevin or Nicky wouldn't walk in. Andrew stood awkwardly for a moment, battling with his mind on whether or not he should get changed in front of Neil.

In the end he did. He had to peel his soaked clothes from his skin. Neil wandered off for a moment and returned with a towel. He tried to not look at Andrew but he knew he did. He could tell by the faint dusting of pink high on his cheekbones.

Andrew toweled himself dry roughly and changed into a dry t-shirt and sweatpants. He sat on the sofa and rested his chin on his knees. Neil flopped down next to him. "Why did you want to know why I liked you?"

Andrew shrugged. Neil stared at him harder. He rolled his eyes but decided to answer. "I guess I thought it was too good to be true. Things this good don't happen to people like me"

"You deserve something good" Neil told him.

"You do too"

"And I've got it" Neil replied.

"You deserve better than me" Andrew said, shifting uncomfortably. "I'm a fuck up. If I could fix myself to make me better for you, I would"

Neil leaned in close. "Yes or no?"

"Yes" Andrew breathed, barely making a sound.

Neil captured Andrew's lips with his own. Andrew savoured the warm, sweet taste of his mouth. He pulled away for a second, "Can I touch your hair?"

"Yes" Andrew repeated. He sunk back into the sofa, lost in the feel of Neil's mouth and the feeling of his blunt fingernails gently scraping his scalp. "Can I touch your hips?" Andrew asked through kiss swollen lips.

"Yes"

Andrew rested his hands on Neil's hips, pulling him closer until their chests were flush together. Neil pulled away and rested his forehead against Andrew's, panting slightly. "You're not a fuck up. Fucked up things have happened to you but you're not a fuck up"

Andrew wanted to protest but he couldn't find the words. He just stared into Neil's eyes.

"Andrew, I think I love you"

Andrew was sure his heart stopped. "Why?"

"You're my home" Neil said gently. He kissed Andrew again, but just quickly. "You're the strongest person I know." Another kiss. "You make me forget everything that's wrong with me"

Another kiss.

Another kiss.

_Another kiss._

The roaring in Andrew's head ceased. For once he believed that someone could care for him. Andrew buried his face in the crook of Neil's neck, inhaling his scent. He kissed him there, featherlight. 

"Do you believe me now?"

"Yes"

"Good." Neil kissed the top of his head. "You don't have to say it back ya know"

Andrew couldn't bring himself to say the words. "I do" he said, hoping Neil understood.

Neil tightened his squeeze and Andrew knew he did.


End file.
